Just found my TF's character

Notanumber wrote:

Its asked for it
Shut your eyes and it will become a red Austin 100 Countryman in Torquay


Well...she is now called Sybil!
 

Hmm, I can just imagine everyone on this forum saying ' yeh, mine does this' ! These cars certainly keep you guessing !

I'm guessing that the two special screws I spent an hour making have dropped down below the gear change mech. As they are stainless my magnet is useless, To take all the stuff out of the way to retrieve them is probably a couple of hours work, I'll make some more. Pisser.
M

And can't you just feel the car grinning....
My alarm played up after I connected the battery back up but seems to be ok now.
I'm still loving it.😁

A bit more character showing thriugh..
From day one it's had that MG wiper problem where they come on in their own time. When it's convenient for them not me.
Last night following a van on a country road the washers stopped working and driving with a very dirty screen was a bit scary.
All 4 jets didn't work so it had to be a common problem as I could hear the motor pumping like a good 'un.
Lifted the bonnet this morning and saw the little round regulator..water in..no water out.
Removed it and using my best watch back removal tactics, hammer, chisel and mole grips, removed the cap. Sure enough the inlet was blocked. Cleaned that, checked the diaphragm and spring and the outlet pipe all of which looked good. No holes and not stretched.
Still very poor flow out of it and try as I might I wasn't very happy.
Confession time...I had to cut a coil off the spring...OH NO...we don't cut springs on our cars!! It will never pass an MOT now!
Just call it a performance mod that the insurers will never know about.
It drills holes in the windscreen now..take that you miserable little car.

It’s a good idea to take the washer bottle out every so often & give it a clean. The detergents & what ever alchemical mysteries the warlocks use, brew up this concoction, coagulate & leach out into our dimension. It’s like frogspawn without the black dots.
It’s this stuff, when mixed with grot which gets carried up & either blocks the non return valve or the jets.
Getting the standard jets to point in the correct direction & perform consistently was a challenge I tired of rapidly, fitting instead a pair of the classic chrome over brass squirty things. An improvement but not a panacea.
Ultimately I’ve ended up with four rather lovely jets arrange for the entire wiped area of the screen being blasted before the wiper arms lift off the stops.
It could be considered a little OTT but seeing where I’m going comes higher on the list of importance, than what some smart arse might think.
M

Actually it did look like blackfrog spawn. It cleared easily enough once I had it all apart.
I removed the jets from the bonnet and gave them a good rodding with an old guitar string.
I think one jet needs to be tweaked a little lower so I don't wash the screen of the car behind.
I have to admit it was scary on a narrow country road with a dirty screen. 
I've just been out tweaking my headlights as they were poorly adjusted. Mot failure coming my way!

The standard jets do leave a bit to be desired, I don't recall what they came from now but I replaced mine with those from some awful festering french Poogoat or Shitroen of some sort or another at the scrappy's yard.
 

The  jets seem ok now..just need to tweak one of them if it will.
Besides..my car is British..don't want to cross breed with Johnny Foreigner.. 
said tongue in cheek!

You can delete the non return valve without a problem, hence getting rid of a restriction in the flow and a potential clogging site. The fluid falls back into the reservoir making a 0.5-1 second delay when you activate the washers, but it's never caused me an issue.

It does stop fluid sitting in the jets, so that their is less chance of frozen jets in the Winter.😅

I did wonder about leaving it out and thought of the drainage back to the reservoir but now it has been performance modded it's gteat! 😁😁

Ok more character that's doin' me hed in!

The alarm has a mind of it's own. It goes off on it"s own accord.
Saturday unlocked car on key fob, tentatively opened drivers door, ok, unlocked boot and pulled bonnet release, ok, lifted bonnet and removed spare wheel tools, ok, got my trolleyjack and lifted front wheel of the car to remove brake pads...halfway through looking at the pads the alarm goes off and the horn is deafening.
I understand the alarm and immobiliser are deeply entrenched in the ECU.
I don't need an alarm, don't care about insurers, just want rid of it.
If I were to wire the horn directly to the button so I am legal would disconnecting the wires from it mess with the ECU and cause problems?
Never, ever had a car with alarm or imobilser problems. 
So far it has gone off when I have been next to it. What if it goes off in town and the bomb squad blow it up?!
Help please.
Edit: 2002 135 TF square alarm fob.