The joke thread.

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Oh God! Take away this hangover and I'll never drink again.




And forgive me in advance for lying about never drinking again.

2 coppers visit a shaggers car park late at night and saw 3 parked cars.....
they knocked on the window of the 1st car and asked...what are you doing?..
the reply was..."we are doing the cha,cha,cha.
then they went to the second car and asked...what are you doing?..the reply was..."we are doing the foxtrot!
then they went to the 3rd car and knocked on the window.......dont tell me the copper said....you are doing the bosanova!.....no was the reply....im doing the boss a favour!.. :slapme:

Dont yer just love them chickhen jokes!

Q.........How did bob marley like his doughnuts?

A..........wi jammin........... :wave:

Why couldn't they fit the lid to Bob marleys coffin??

Cos it kept jammin.




:coat:

What's the difference between a kangaroo and a kangaroot ?

A kangaroo is an Australian marsupial.
And a kangaroot is a Geordie stuck in a lift. :nonod:


:beer: :beer: Steve

Jack tells his doctor how he can no longer sustain an erection.
After a complete examination the doctor tells jack "the problem is that the muscles at the base of the penis are damaged.theres really nothing i can do unless you are willing to try an experimental treatment.we would take the muscles from the trunk of a baby elephant and implant them in your penis"
The thought of going through life without sex was too much for jack so he agreed to try the treatment.
A few weeks after the operation jack was given the green light to try out his new equiptment.He planned a romantic evening for his girlfriend and took her to one of the nicest restaraunts in the city.
During dinner he felt pain building in his groin.
To release the preasure jack unzipped his fly.....his penis immediately went to the top of the table,grabbed a roll and then returned to his pants.
His girlfriend was stunned at first but then said with a sly smile "that was incredible! can you do that again?"
"i can try" said jack."but i dont think my ass can take another roll.! :coat: